Today, I am super excited to share an interview with Llinos Mai Thomas with you.
Llinos Mai Thomas is a writer, cancer survivor, mental health warrior and creative soul from Cardiff, UK. She shares her health journey to inspire others on the road to healing, and has raised thousands of pounds for charity.
Her book, Cancer, Chemo & Curls, has inspired and touch me tremendously and I just had to introduce you to her thoughts on cancer, body image and self-love today. Enjoy the interview and be sure to check out her work.
Can you share your story about surviving cancer as a child?
I grew up in Anglesey, UK, and had a very close knit family consisting of my parents and paternal grandparents. I was shy and studious at school, and was teased because of it.
However, my world was first torn apart when my grandmother died in August 1999, and a few short months later I began experiencing agonising stomach pains.
I was repeatedly told that as a 12 year old girl, this was simply a prelude to puberty. It wasn’t until I collapsed in school that my pain was taken more seriously.
Following tests, a 100 mile trip to a children’s hospital and a six hour operation, I was diagnosed with cancer. A tumour and an ovary were removed during the operation.
I underwent six sessions of chemotherapy and went through all of the nasty side effects.. weight loss, hair loss, low immune system, nausea…I didn’t attend school and instead received home tuition a couple of times a week. Finally, I got better and I have now been cancer free for 14 years.
Everyday I am so grateful to be alive.
In the years since then, I have dedicated myself to charity work, campaigning and raising awareness of teen cancer. My latest project has been to set up my blog and write my book, to inspire others with health difficulties to live a fulfilling life.
What made you decide to write your book?
I have loved writing and reading since I was a very young child. I filled my life with stories and books. Throughout my lonely teenage years, as I struggled to cope with what cancer had done to me physically and emotionally, my diary was my closest friend.
In the back of my mind, I had a dream of being an author, and putting my story onto paper and sending it out into the world. I really believe that this tale of a girl who overcame cancer can inspire and touch others, and shine a light on what life as a teen cancer patient is like.
Finally, in 2013 the dream felt more real. I enrolled on a non-fiction book planning course, with the words of my oncologist ringing in my ears: “You used to like writing, why don’t you do that any more…”
The words simply flowed onto the page, and being so authentic and raw was very cathartic for me. Now I already have two more books planned!
How has your self-image changed because of cancer?
I was so young when cancer came into my life, I really wasn’t ready for the physical changes it would bring. I had only recently learned about puberty; now I was being told I only had one ovary left.
As a child I loved my long wavy blonde hair; I was so upset to lose it, and to watch thick and unruly brunette curls take its place after chemo.
I was bulled a lot due to my hair, and I still have days when I wish I had sleek straight hair; but I choose to put it in a ponytail and get on with enjoying my day. Also, I lost so much weight in the aftermath of my operation, that I was kept away from mirrors.
The medical staff didn’t want me to like how skinny I looked, in case I developed an eating disorder. Due to the huge tumour my eating habits had become erratic as I felt full so quickly, and post op I didn’t have much appetite.
I put the weight back on quickly once chemo began and I needed every ounce of energy I could muster, and I developed stretch marks on my stomach and legs. I hated them. I thought they looked disgusting.
I also had a 20cm scar on my stomach, and scars on my collar bones where I had an operation to insert the little box which would be where I would receive chemo into my body. I used to do everything I could to hide my scars by not wearing low tops or skirts, but now I don’t mind so much.
I may have curly hair, scars and stretch marks, but now I choose to be proud of them. They are a part of my journey and a reminder of how lucky I am to be alive.
What have you learned about body-love and body-acceptance because of cancer?
For years I have struggled to love my stomach. Scarred, internally and externally by cancer and surgery, I found it hard to reconcile that my own body could create such a horrible thing as a killer tumour. However, now I prefer to think about how my body healed, with drugs and love.
It was one of Anne-Sophie’s Friday videos which made me think, “I really need to love my stomach.” This year I have had keyhole surgery to remove a benign cyst, and I took the time to be so grateful for the healing powers of my stomach and be gentle with myself.
I wear clothes that make me feel good, play with makeup to enhance my features, and concentrate of the bits of myself I love. I have a bright smile, good skin, and long legs. Also, when I’m filled with the joy of writing a book or blog post, I’m too happy to think about my stomach!
I am not a model, and that’s okay. I’m a real, average sized woman, living with soul and on purpose. {Click to tweet}
How do you practice self-care in your every day life?
In 2012 I was diagnosed with depression. Burnt out and in despair, I knew my life had to change. Since then, I’ve been on a journey of self discovery. I love being creative, by painting or crocheting.
A day out in the sun with my boyfriend or a meal with friends is heavenly. I love our house and our guinea pigs, who can be relied upon to lift my spirits instantly!
As the life of a writer involves a lot of sitting down, I try to walk daily and do some yoga stretches. I also enjoy skipping in my garden. I like experimenting with new recipes, and at the moment I’m trying a few healthy baking recipes and my favourite snack is raw fudge.
I’m multi-passionate and spiritual and I embrace every part of myself. Self care is essential for my mental health and I respect my own needs.
What is a message you’d like to share with all the women out there?
From my soul to yours, we can all live happy lives and reach our dreams. Go out there and live your best life! You are beautiful and unique and so loved by the universe.
If you have a dream you’re afraid to pursue, take it in tiny steps. Also, as a global community, I believe we will eventually overcome cancer. In me, cancer has a fierce enemy.
If you enjoyed this interview, you can connect with Llinos on her website, Twitter or Facebook.
